because I'm co-dependent it pains me to think of being single - it sends me into a panic - but I'm in such a foul mood because of being unemployed and the horrible unemployment appointment I'm dreading on Friday that for a second I said to myself, "I hope he leaves me so I can just die alone now'.  There's so much I want to do - like travel! - I don't think I'll ever be able to, so escape in any form sounds delightful.