(no subject)
Sep. 21st, 2019 10:08 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kahluagalSister: I'm really to help and start calling and booking movers!
Me: I'm still packing and haven't found an apartment yet because I'm in Illinois in DAY LONG WORKSHOPS from 8-6 and they're using my computer hooked up to the projector
It terrifies me that I don't have a lot of friends, and that one person I'll have to depend on if I end up going back to Toronto is the bossiest person in my life. About three days of her is all that can happen before she bosses me around. She bossed me through our mother's funeral, she bossed me through Andy's. I stood my ground and told her I was grieving and running around and I needed to move slowly rather than moving LESS THAN A WEEK after he died - but no, whenever I'm assertive people don't like it. I was rational and articulate and her nose got out of joint.
This is why I don't have people in my life. I don't trust them anymore. I've been burnt too much. The folks on the widowers subreddit are probably the only ones who can understand what this is like. I really wish I could find one of them to move in with.
Today's list:
-sell mirror - DONE. If I can get the couch and some money for it, whoot.
-continue with posting on FB and Craigslist
-Laundry and pack for travel this week.
-book travel in 2 weeks
-Try and find a salon to book for next weekend?
-Call with sister about dad's fall and him having surgery - book up to Toronto for a visit?
-Continue with packing - maybe just put most of kitchen stuff in donation box at this point
-Get TaskRabbit to send Andy's stuff to good will - his clothes. God I hate this.
-Arrange donation of all household items at this point rather than the stress of Craigslist people who are flaking out on me.
-
I am trying to rid myself of all his goth furniture and things because I need to find a way to move on. Also the bitch Andy owed money for pot is just hanging around the building because Its Hers and it's like - I can't wait to move. Escaping her toxicity too. So now I have to try and time going for laundry for when she's not there. That's my reward for this hellish chapter - escaping anywhere else. I dread looking for apartments and roommates - I would absolutely just live in a simple hotel like scenario because I don't even know if I'm staying here and just want to escape.
New York can die in a fire. This has been a massive mistake.
Me: I'm still packing and haven't found an apartment yet because I'm in Illinois in DAY LONG WORKSHOPS from 8-6 and they're using my computer hooked up to the projector
It terrifies me that I don't have a lot of friends, and that one person I'll have to depend on if I end up going back to Toronto is the bossiest person in my life. About three days of her is all that can happen before she bosses me around. She bossed me through our mother's funeral, she bossed me through Andy's. I stood my ground and told her I was grieving and running around and I needed to move slowly rather than moving LESS THAN A WEEK after he died - but no, whenever I'm assertive people don't like it. I was rational and articulate and her nose got out of joint.
This is why I don't have people in my life. I don't trust them anymore. I've been burnt too much. The folks on the widowers subreddit are probably the only ones who can understand what this is like. I really wish I could find one of them to move in with.
Today's list:
-sell mirror - DONE. If I can get the couch and some money for it, whoot.
-continue with posting on FB and Craigslist
-Laundry and pack for travel this week.
-book travel in 2 weeks
-Try and find a salon to book for next weekend?
-Call with sister about dad's fall and him having surgery - book up to Toronto for a visit?
-Continue with packing - maybe just put most of kitchen stuff in donation box at this point
-Get TaskRabbit to send Andy's stuff to good will - his clothes. God I hate this.
-Arrange donation of all household items at this point rather than the stress of Craigslist people who are flaking out on me.
-
I am trying to rid myself of all his goth furniture and things because I need to find a way to move on. Also the bitch Andy owed money for pot is just hanging around the building because Its Hers and it's like - I can't wait to move. Escaping her toxicity too. So now I have to try and time going for laundry for when she's not there. That's my reward for this hellish chapter - escaping anywhere else. I dread looking for apartments and roommates - I would absolutely just live in a simple hotel like scenario because I don't even know if I'm staying here and just want to escape.
New York can die in a fire. This has been a massive mistake.
