(no subject)

Once again, I'm with a partner who doesn't share my life goals.  I left out the hours on Facebook he spends 'networking', a.k.a. hitting share with musician flyers.   I'm sorry he can't get hired because he dropped out of art school, but I am clearly slumming.  It's not enough that he loves me anymore.  He has no savings, no ambition and is sleepwalking through life - and I don't care, as long as I can work on my goals and back away, bit by bit.  Now that I have a job I'm desperate to keep, I need to start squirreling away money, even look into investing and fucking web camming or whatever I can do when traveling for work so that I build up my savings - and also figure out where I want to live, because New York can go fuck itself.  I'm seriously thinking of a PhD program overseas, or maybe return home (UGH).  Sleeping in my sister's basement makes me want to poke out my eyes.  I am done with partners.  It's not fucking work it. I can't be myself with any of these people, and I don't want to anymore.

I have an extensive to do list, including going to a Women's Codependency group so I can get the fuck out of dodge and make some friends in this city so that when it all goes to hell, I'll have a circle of women to depend on, which is in the end ALL I NEED.